Why Haven’t I Got A Poltergeist Yet?


OK so, Wikipedia, that font of trusted knowledge (I jest of course) explains the Poltergeist as follows “In ghostlore, a Poltergeist, German for ‘rumbling ghost’ or ‘noisy spirit’ is a type of ghost or spirit that is responsible for physical disturbances, such as loud noises and objects being moved or destroyed.”

Well thank you Wiki for those nuggets of wisdom.

I knew that already but after scanning the Wiki entry it became clear that one of the most popular tropes among paranormal experts and amateurs alike is that poltergeists are sometimes created by pubescent girls. Take for instance the Enfield poltergeist case from many moons ago. Their Poltergeist was assumed to be assisted somewhat by the presence of two teenage girls, with Janet, the eldest, assumed to be the main source of energy for the troublesome spook.

Enfield isn’t an isolated case. Hormones play an active part in many Poltergeist hauntings around the globe, so my question is pretty simple really. Why didn’t I get one?

Obviously this post is a little tongue in cheek; I am currently holidaying in Cumbria and to be honest it’s nearly my bedtime so I didn’t want to be too serious (you know, nightmares?)

As I’m sure many of you with BPD will attest, it can feel like we are somewhat emotionally stunted. The alternative name for BPD, Emotionally unstable personality disorder, outlines the problems posed by our emotions. Sometimes it can feel like we have never really grown up emotionally. I know that even now at 39, I still feel quite childlike when it comes to dealing with some things. Since moving into my flat and living alone for the first time, some of these issues have been improved upon; such as making phone calls, sorting out bills and living expenses, for example. But others, like relationships with people and socialising still pose some considerable problems for me. My first instinct when encountering an interpersonal problem is to turn my back on it and let bridges burn rather than stay and tough it out.

I’d probably say that actually the issue isn’t with instability in my emotions, but rather the fact that my emotions are incredibly basic. Consider if you will the black and white thinking of the BPD mind. It is a very simplistic way of looking at the world. In some situations things really are black and white but for the majority of everyday issues there is plenty of grey shade in between, even though I can’t usually see it (Hence the therapy). So if we think of emotions in the same way, i.e reduced to their simplest forms, it is – I think – working in the same way as black and white thinking. Our minds are keeping tidy little piles, with tidy little notes and tidy little pieces highlighted in vivid pink.

Thinking about things in a simple way isn’t necessarily a terrible thing. We understand things very well as long as they fit the descriptors we have assigned to them. The problem arises when we are faced with multiple emotions, when our brains can’t fit them into their neat little boxes. This leads to confusion and sometimes depending on the severity of the situation, panic. This may show itself in a number of ways, we may withdraw completely, we may sink into the depths of depression with feelings of hopelessness and despair, we may become irritable because our minds are too crowded, or we may kick off completely. There are loads of ways emotional overload can present itself, and it doesn’t have to be the same way each time.

So to conclude,

Where is my poltergeist? Surely with all of the times I have been lost in my own mind, I at least deserve a spooky friend to throw plates at the walls for me? Maybe I would love it if I had a phantom that opened cupboard doors for me, or rattled the pipes? But alas! For now I’m going to have to do it myself.

Thanks for reading this far

Love to you all



One thought on “Why Haven’t I Got A Poltergeist Yet?

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