It’s funny. I’m just finishing at the pub, I’ve finished last order drink and I’m outside having a puff while everyone else finishes theirs. We’ve been talking about careers. I’m surrounded by so many successful people, I’m proud to say they are my friends. I on the other hand have retail managerial experience and little else, and now I’m sitting on disability wondering where life went. It’s easy to try and compare yourself to the people around you, easy to think yourself hard done by or somehow inferior, but I know somewhere inside I am worthy. I’m a good person, I am great with people who are struggling with life. I am empathetic, massively empathetic actually. That surely puts me in good stead for something if I can in the future. I know I’m reaching the point of no return in respects to a career in anything really and I wonder if I will be ok. I cant contemplate it for now. Thinking of the future is a sure fire way to upset myself. As someone who has bpd, the future is a hard concept to grasp. I will try as much as I can to be an asset to my country, but most of all, I hope I can be an asset to myself. That’s all I need and want to be honest. Just to be happy in the life that I have chosen.
Published by Abominable Bell Blog
I am at the tail-end of my thirties, starting afresh as a singleton, moving into my own place by myself for the first time in my life, all while navigating life after lockdowns and living with Borderline Personality Disorder. This blog will be my journal. Some little bits about me to get you started. I love Godzilla, pizza, animals (except frogs), reading and vodka. View all posts by Abominable Bell Blog